Are They The 'One' You Should Marry?

Isaiah credits me for pushing him to propose to his wife, Careen, because I saw how she possessed something that many men wish they had beside them.

How do you know if someone is the right one to marry? It's a difficult question to answer, but it's a necessary one to ask so you don't spend years with someone you'll hate.

Recently, my friend Isaiah Carter got married, and I'll be one of his groomsmen at his wedding ceremony in a couple of weeks.

Isaiah credits me for pushing him to propose to his wife, Careen, because I saw how she possessed something that many men wish they had beside them.

It all started about a year ago when we all attended a Red Bulls game together. I believe I had met her once before, but this was the first time we were all together doing an activity as friends.

For me, it goes beyond the obviousness of them being a cool couple, and I look at the subtleties that matter far more. I watched how she looked at him with reverence and had genuine respect for him.

We were at a soccer game, which was more of his interest, but she was just as excited as he was to be there and wore matching jerseys with him.

There was a value to their relationship that most people are searching for, and it's hard to simplify by using a single word. I can only come up with a phrase that fits: She rocks with him.

Or, in other words, she's in full support of him and whatever he wants to do personally or professionally. The root of that support stems from her deep-rooted trust in him as a man.

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I've stated before how my wife trusting me allows me to take risks without worry, leading to a much bigger payoff in the end. His wife possesses a level of faith every man should dream of having beside him when he's attempting to conquer the world.

In many ways, her approach to attending the soccer game with her man is how she approaches everything with him: Whatever he's doing, she's going to match his energy and level of support.

The Bible talks about how when we get married, we become one, and that's what I saw from her. I saw a marriageable woman who only wants to be one with her man.

While at the stadium, I found a moment to pull him aside while she was distracted and said to him with a serious face, "So, when are you going to stop playing around and marry her?"

He was puzzled because of how blunt I was, but he received the message with seriousness. The truth is that I didn't convince him to marry her; I confirmed what he wanted to do all along.

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Sometimes in life, you need that nudge or confirmation that this is the right move, and another man giving his lovingly unsolicited advice is what you need to affirm what you wanted to do all along.

Unlike how most people approach relationship stages as time-oriented, I don't believe that is the end-all, be-all. Plenty of terrible relationships last a long time, and I wouldn't recommend they get married.

Instead, I look at the dynamic between the individuals and the seriousness of their relationship. This is a man who has never said a negative word about her to me and who holds her in high esteem, just as I do when discussing my wife.

And it's not enough to love someone because love only takes you so far. We all have family members we claim to love, but we don't trust them, nor do we like being around them that much.

These two like each other, look forward to hanging out in their pastime, and see every moment they have together as a gift, not a burden.

I told Isaiah to stop playing around because I know how hard it is to find someone like this. Anything of value, you don't let go or take for granted.

And if I'm to be even clearer about my reasoning for Isaiah to marry her: I wanted Isaiah to experience what I have with my wife on a daily basis. I couldn't see myself being with any other woman, and I wouldn't be the man I am today without her.

Months after that conversation, he proposed to her, and over the past year, I've watched him grow in maturity and in his career ambitions beyond what he ever thought would be possible.

It's a lot easier to be hopeful about the future's unknowns when you have someone next to you who honors their vows: For better or worse.

Congratulations, Isaiah and Careen.