I Almost Moved To Germany But Glad I Stayed In America

In December 2018, I almost moved to Berlin, Germany to experience a new challenge in life but I'm incredibly glad that I stayed in America.

The first thing everyone asks is "why Germany?". It stemmed from a curiosity about the German language which led me to attempt to learn it and then subsequently I started solo-traveling to Germany multiple times a year.

I honestly never expected to like Germany but I would find myself going there a couple of times a year until the pandemic, stopping off in Berlin for a few days each time. I then became friends with one of my Airbnb hosts and his girlfriend, who I would visit on every trip.

Back in the states, my IT career was going well but I wasn't completely happy. I felt stagnant & unchallenged at work plus lonely at home as I was single at the time. I was at the beginning part of my personal transformation to become someone better but I felt incomplete.

For background, I've lived in 5 states & probably 6 counties in the state of New Jersey as an adult. In my 20s, I was literally moving every year. My life has always been unstable and the concept of home has been a foreign one for me, so going to Germany didn't seem implausible.

For months I would research immigration & job opportunities in Germany. I came to the conclusion that the only way to make sure I can get in was to find employment first. After many attempts, I got accepted for a 6-month project with the possibility of an extension.

However, a couple weeks later I would find out that the project was abruptly canceled. I would off & on search for employment but nothing would work out for me to move there. I learned by that point that I shouldn't force things to happen; if it's going to happen it will.

Fast forward, I began dating my now wife in September 2019 and I for sure wasn’t going anywhere. 6 months later, the pandemic went into full swing. I would keep in contact with my German friends and hear about how life was far more authoritarian there than my life in New Jersey.

My friend, who had never been vaccinated in his life growing up in the Black Forest of Germany, was forced to get vaccinated after moving to Austria. His girlfriend was able to avoid vaccination but lived a completely separate life from everyone else in Berlin.

Even prior to vaccinations, lockdown measures were horribly strict. I remember talking to them frequently and it felt like every passing day was more demoralizing than the previous for them yet everyone around them seemed to accept every illogical measure that was being enforced.

You really get to see what people are like when they are under immense stress & I believe the pandemic showed us what our governments are capable of doing under stress. While we faced similar issues in America, at least I have a 1st Amendment to voice my displeasure; they don't.

The police can't make me stay in my home indefinitely, that's unconstitutional. In some places in Germany, they were doing this. Without pressure, Germany seems very similar to America but vicariously, I was able to see the lengths their government was willing to go to.

While many here were rightfully angry at our government, I was thankful to be here. I knew people in Europe and South America whose lives were twice as hard. I am thankful to live in a country that doesn't have a near-monolithic political system that streamlines everything.

The pandemic made me realize how much of an American I am and I'm proud to be one. The challenge I was seeking wasn't in a different homeland but within me. I wasn't happy because I wasn't done with my growth journey and jumping ship would have been a huge mistake.

There is no place like home.