Many of us grew up not having a father to celebrate on Father's Day, including me. However, I've chosen the only right path forward: to become the father I always wanted so my son has someone to celebrate.Speaking Wrong At The Right Time is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.
You’re doing exactly the right thing. Be the best Dad you can. I was fortunate that the people that adopted me were great. Which dad was better I’ll never know but the one I got was great.
Wonderful. You became what you didn’t have. That’s a remarkable undertaking and will leave a positively profound ripple effect for your future generations.
Bravo to a real father/dad/man who accepted reality & has carved his own path. You’ve chosen to accept what you couldn’t/can’t change & learn from it. Instead of becoming bitter you have become better. Your children will benefit now & forever.
How we start our lives doesn't need to determine how we finish them.
This is it, the truth.
This will be the first fathers day I don't have a father and I am shamefully giddy. I don't have to make the phone call and pretend there is something there that isn't. I have been inexplicably happier and more at peace since he passed. I feel so guilty about this I don't dare share with anyone. I was with him the day before he died and played my role. I rarely subjected my children to him, he didn't even know about one of them until a year ago. He did not ask, he did not care. I don't blame him or hate him for it, quite the opposite, I loved him for a long time., he gave me great genes and fine siblings. But, he couldn't be something he wasn't and to him I was nothing more than a mutt girl, to exploit. I know now, that I am much more than that. I am a princess in my real Father's eyes. I refuse to live my life based on how it started. Thank you Adam for sharing.
Thank you Mr. Coleman for your wonderful Father’s Day essay, which was the most personally meaningful essay I’ve ever read on the subject. It was as if you were writing about my life.
I too worried that I wouldn’t measure up as a father because I didn’t know what it looked like, good or bad, as mine was entirely absent. I hope that I’ve done it justice because even though the bar was set low I worried that my lack of any role model would hinder my ability to get it right. But at least I showed up and loved and valued and raised every one of my children and that’s a good start. Happy Father’s Day to you.
Happy Father’s Day! You have rightly chosen to be a present and positive role model for your child. And you also figured out how you could learn from a NEGATIVE role model: people underestimate how much can be learned from seeing what NOT to do!
You’re doing exactly the right thing. Be the best Dad you can. I was fortunate that the people that adopted me were great. Which dad was better I’ll never know but the one I got was great.
Wonderful. You became what you didn’t have. That’s a remarkable undertaking and will leave a positively profound ripple effect for your future generations.
Bravo to a real father/dad/man who accepted reality & has carved his own path. You’ve chosen to accept what you couldn’t/can’t change & learn from it. Instead of becoming bitter you have become better. Your children will benefit now & forever.
Happy Father’s Day!
How we start our lives doesn't need to determine how we finish them.
This is it, the truth.
This will be the first fathers day I don't have a father and I am shamefully giddy. I don't have to make the phone call and pretend there is something there that isn't. I have been inexplicably happier and more at peace since he passed. I feel so guilty about this I don't dare share with anyone. I was with him the day before he died and played my role. I rarely subjected my children to him, he didn't even know about one of them until a year ago. He did not ask, he did not care. I don't blame him or hate him for it, quite the opposite, I loved him for a long time., he gave me great genes and fine siblings. But, he couldn't be something he wasn't and to him I was nothing more than a mutt girl, to exploit. I know now, that I am much more than that. I am a princess in my real Father's eyes. I refuse to live my life based on how it started. Thank you Adam for sharing.
Thank you for sharing your story as well. I appreciate it.
Thank you Mr. Coleman for your wonderful Father’s Day essay, which was the most personally meaningful essay I’ve ever read on the subject. It was as if you were writing about my life.
I too worried that I wouldn’t measure up as a father because I didn’t know what it looked like, good or bad, as mine was entirely absent. I hope that I’ve done it justice because even though the bar was set low I worried that my lack of any role model would hinder my ability to get it right. But at least I showed up and loved and valued and raised every one of my children and that’s a good start. Happy Father’s Day to you.
The fact that you cared is all that matters. Caring will lead you to success. I'm sure you're a good father.
Happy Father's Day.
Happy Father’s Day! You have rightly chosen to be a present and positive role model for your child. And you also figured out how you could learn from a NEGATIVE role model: people underestimate how much can be learned from seeing what NOT to do!