Pearl, 'Date Nights' Aren't Transactional If You Marry Your Friend

Recently, YouTube personality Hannah Pearl Davis implied that "date nights" are one-sided measures only wanted by women & used to leverage sex.

But when you marry someone you like, date nights aren't a chore for men: They're a pleasure. I married someone I like hanging out with & experiencing new things with.

About six months into dating my wife was when the COVID lockdowns occurred. We were secluded from the world and isolated together, yet our relationship flourished because I got to spend lots of time with my friend, my now wife.

Without anywhere to go, we would spend hours watching YouTube content and having long discussions, filled with love and laughter. It was during this period that solidified that I wanted to marry her because I genuinely like my wife.

We often throw around the word "love". When it comes to romance, love is strong and often temporary. But when you like someone, it's long-lasting and not always based on a response to strong emotions. Whether it's a good day or a bad day, I like being around my wife.

We don't have to do anything special either for us to have a good time. At the beginning of the lockdowns, we underestimated the measures and thought about driving five hours to Canada for a weekend. Well, we made it to the border & turned around and drove home.

We still laugh about this story because we were so naive but also because we had a great time together driving 10 hours, telling stories, and laughing about life. There was no sex involved or bargaining to spend time with her because you'd never want to manipulate a true friend.

My favorite thing about my wife is watching her experience something for the first time because her emotions are all over her face. Her experiencing something joyous makes me feel good too, especially if I was the one who introduced it to her.

In September we will celebrate our third wedding anniversary and five years of being together. Within this timeframe, we've already been to eight countries together. These are places she never thought she would touch ground in until we met each other.

We've been blessed to have seen some of the most iconic monuments, like the Eiffel Tower in Paris and the Brandenburg Gate in Berlin, and it takes on a different meaning to experience these types of adventures with someone you like.

So, as someone who has traveled thousands of miles with his wife in a cramped airplane, when my wife recommends a place for us to have a date night together it's never a chore: it's a blessing to have found someone that wants to spend this precious time on earth with me.

Pearl's understanding of marriage revolves primarily around sexual intimacy and ignores all of the positive attributes of marriage. She can't comprehend a genuine friendship you could have with the person you gave vows to or wanting to sacrifice for someone you love.

I don't know if Pearl's parents are transactional and so she thinks everyone else's marriage is this way but there is nothing transactional about my marriage. The feelings are mutual about our respect for each other and our friendship.

No one needs to twist my arm to spend time with my friend. I don't need sex to hang out with my wife and it's sad that Pearl believes this is the default circumstance for men.